Thursday, December 20, 2012

My rival the bitch...


When Oga and I were  courting, I knew he had a passion for Agriculture, Farming and I knew  he also loved animals, especially dogs. I didn't have a problem with that because I liked  dogs as well. When we got married, he kept one or two dogs but it was difficult caring for them properly because of work so he had to get rid of them, but his dream of breeding dogs never died. By then I couldn't be bothered about caring for dogs because I was expecting our first baby, D1 and I wasn't really keen on caring for dogs especially the cleaning up part!
Years later, Oga managed to balance work and his passion i.e. dog breeding, but on a small scale ( plus jamming  awoof luck of having a  nanny that loves dogs as well, Mscheeeew!). I didn't have any problem with that either. 

The problem started when things started disappearing from the kitchen.... Pots, cooking spoons, stainless steel tray, raw rice, Mama Lemon, dish sponge, kerosene, palm oil, pepper, milk, golden morn etc. I've even had instances when I would see strange concoctions cooking on my gas cooker. If it wasn't for my constant nagging to Oga to  get rid of the dogs I'm sure those dogs will be sleeping inside the house with us and demanding equal rights  and treatment!
The kind of havoc they cause na the expensive type. Oga just turns the other cheek. There was a time I was  away on holiday with the kids and Oga was home by himself. He ran some laundry which was mostly his vests  and left them outside overnight (like 10 of them with a very thick towel). He unchained the dogs for the night and totally forgot to barricade where he spread his laundry to dry. He met rags on the floor the next  day. They shredded the vests and towel like confetti! I got a frantic call from Lagos that morning....

Me: How are you dear, wassup?
 Oga: Did I wake you up dear? Sorry o, I just wanted to talk to you and the kids.
Me: (Gbeborun radar up and alert!) But you don't normally call this early, is anything  wrong?
 Oga: Not really, just that I'm going to need some new vests please help me get some.
Me: Okay,like how many?
Oga: Like 12 or so.
Me: But you just got some news ones not too long ago,why do you need so many again?
Oga: Errrm......Kii and Arr ate some of my new vests that I forgot outside.
I laughed and laughed tire! If not that he needed my help to get new vests he would have swept the whole episode under the carpet without my knowledge!

Oga: Oh! Please help me get an extra towel as well .
 Me: They chopped your towel too? I can't laugh!

  The day I knew those dogs' days were numbered was when Kii got pregnant and Oga threw caution to the wind. Planning daily menu with the nanny on her feeding, buying Pregnacare for her, taking up all my freezer space to store chicken neck packs for Kii, using my kerosene and gas to cook her meals. Hmmmmm thinks I, 'the only thing wey remain na for this dog to wear nightie and hairnet and sleep on bed o! Kii don become my rival.

One fateful evening, Kii refused to eat and the nanny duly reported to Oga. Oga went outside to check on her. He was taking forever to come back in so I went to check what was happening. I met Oga feeding shicken neck to Kii one by one! Hian! Wetin be dis na?  Oga never fed me like this when I was pregnant and didn't have appetite,whish kain rival be dis? "Kii" I swore silently to myself, "I will make sure you  leave this house!"


 Luckily for Kii I didn't have to take drastic actions to get rid of her, Oga had  arranged alternative accommodation  for Kii just before she put to bed. Hurray!!! Thank you Lord! But wait o, I suspect Oga sensed my animosity towards Kii and feared for her safety or was it a coincidence???

P.s: One of my favorite posts as well, #OKBYE.

2 comments:

  1. Lmao! That part about the dog wearing nightie and hairnet and getting into bed gets me everytime...even i would be jealous of such attention

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See? No one would have blamed me if I had taken drastic steps to get rid of her.

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