Thursday, March 28, 2013

Delivered from Ekaette's clutches...part 2

Hello peeps! so sorry i've been MIA for a while.....too many things to do and too little time. The concluding part of my story.......

 Ekaette was the Sales girl/Cook.  Her menu was quite limited, It was either" Ugwu soup day" or" Egusi soup day" and the soups both had one thing in common..... Dodgy meat (A.k.a spoilt meat) . She was always buying meat from those roving butchers (after the butcher waka waka all over Lagos and beyond, he would now offload the rest of the unsold beef on Ekaette late in the evening ). I guess she was just thinking cheap. 

 Oga stumbled upon my secret rendezvous in Ekaette's Food Joint and banned me from going there  again, especially when I confessed to him that the meat was always tasting off and I was always throwing up after eating Ekaette's "Soup"!  "Please Willow, don't harm my unborn child  with all these your ijekuje, If you want Vegetable soup, when I get back from work I will take you out to buy it (we were staying off Allen Avenue then, plenty Fast Food Joint around). Just stop going there!" "Okay, I've heard" I would  respond meekly.    
The next day, as soon as Oga stepped out to go to work,  I'd rush to the kitchen, wash two bowls and pack it ready for Ekaette's "delicacy" for the day. As soon as it was 11am, I would waddle to Ekaette's place swinging my nylon bag with the two empty bowls in it. One bowl for morning meal  and one for the afternoon meal (Oga would sort out evening swallow when he got back from work). Then I would go back home and eat Ekaette's  half cooked,watery, peppery, appetite- killing Egusi soup with dodgy meat! 10 minutes  after consuming the food, I would throw up! ( Her Ugwu soup tasted better  but the meat was still baaad!).

  After throwing up I would swear off her food but the next day I would go back there again! I still can't explain why I kept going back there though. Could it be because of

1. Ekaette's Charming personality? (She barely acknowledged my "good mornings" when I used to go  over)  OR her

2.Culinary skillz? (I wish!) OR even  her

 3.Customer service skillz? (Ekaette*responding to a customer*:  No rush me na! I dey come! Hisss!). 

Hmmm...I think not.

 I wasn't mobile so I guess it was the nearest available place for me.
You would think that Ekaette's rude attitude, dodgy meat and me constantly throwing up would cure me of Ekaette's cooking, Na lie!! It was a vicious cycle.

My Deliverance from Ekaette's cooking clutches came last week of December of that year (2004) when Ekaette travelled to the village for the Christmas/ New Year period. You would think being her regular customer for over two months she would have had the courtesy to inform me in advance (I thought we had "bonded" o!) of her trip, well she didn't.(Hmmm....I wonder if it had anything to do with the fact that I told her to stop buying/cooking  dodgy meat?). 

I waited till the New year to resume my "patronage", Ekaette never turned up for the two weeks I consistently  stalked   visited that place. Then, I stopped going over and simply lost interest just like that( Halleluyah!). She later came back around the last week  of January,but by then I had moved on jor! Oga was none the wiser.

 Thank God!  When I think back and remember all of Ekaette's dishes that I consumed, I still shake my head in disbelief and horror.  D2's pregnancy was quite tame. D3's pregnancy is another story for another day!


  1. hahaha,ekaette hypnotized u ooo, thank God for the deliverance. missed your posts!!!!!!!!


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